I think it is easy to look at others and think, "I wish my house was that clean," or "I wish I could decorate my house like that," or "I wish I could eat healthy and stay in shape like them." With Facebook, Pinterest and just the internet in general, it seems that our society is in a constant state of feeling like they aren't good enough. And I think perception is a big part of it. I've had so many people say things like this with regards to me and I think, "uh, what?" They can't possibly be calling my house clean considering the bathrooms have about 2 months worth of number 1 AND number 2 smeared all over them (did we all forget that I have 4 boys??). And hopefully they don't actually touch my kitchen counters. Because the granite design does a great job in hiding the couple weeks worth of dirt and grime on them. They can't possibly be calling me healthy considering I just hid in the pantry to eat a few pieces of chocolate after breakfast so my kids wouldn't see me and ask for some.
I feel like I am constantly battling off similar thoughts about everyone else. How come they all have children happily participating in the soccer game and mine is in the corner picking his nose or running across the parking lot? Why do I cringe when my kids ask to paint knowing that it will be a hassle to clean-up afterwards even though I know a "good" mom would encourage crafts (I just tell them that art class in school is a better resource for these things, lol)? When we were having the 2nd oldest evaluated by the Speech Therapist, she remarked that it was amazing how advanced his vocabulary was. I was like, "oh, he learned that from Little Einsteins." Let me just put it out there - my kids watch a LOT of tv and are obsessed with video games. Mother of the Year over here:) They are ridiculously smart because of it, but I know that I should limit their screen time...sigh. Yet, I don't. I accomplish a heck of a lot more when they are in electronic comas and frankly, my house is just so much more peaceful. Yeah, yeah, I know, Mother of the Year.
My point here is that we all need to give ourselves a break. Instead of trying to be perfect at everything, just pick a couple of things to work on. Everything else? Let's just aim for "just good enough." Back when I had only one child, my house was very clean and freshly baked goods were coming out of the oven when I hosted playgroup, often with a craft or activity all planned out. Now with 4 kids at home, today I tossed enough toys in the bins so that the babies wouldn't trip, grabbed some store made bakery items at Teeter last night during my son's Tae Kwon Do practice (forgetting juice boxes and deciding that the kids would be happier with water anyways!) and just managed to clean the toddler and puppy pee and poop off the floor before people arrived (we're potty training this week!). I had meant to scrub down the Powder Room as well since I like to have a clean bathroom for guests to use, but I just ran out of time. So I wiped off the nutella finger prints on the toilet that looked an awful lot like poop and then said, "eh, good enough" and shut the door:)
Basement cleaning? That is SO 4 years ago. Now I just make sure there aren't toys on the stairs so kids don't trip. And then I encourage the parents to stay upstairs so that they can't see that the basement hasn't been picked up since I hosted playgroup 2 months ago and that the colony of stink bugs have already had about 7 generations of babies and have all died in the corners of my basement. Heading out to the store in the middle of winter? My kids are wearing shorts, one sock, mismatched shoes and no coat. But they are clothed and in the car - "eh, good enough." The dish I'm baking for a party burns a little? I just cut off that piece and put it on a pretty plate - "eh, good enough." I forgot to sign-up to bring something to the class party? Well, I still showed up, even if I spent most of the time chasing down the screaming, half-naked toddler - "eh, good enough."
You get my point, right? OF COURSE mine and the lives of everyone else look perfect. Why would I post pictures of my dirty toilets on Facebook? Instead I will post my picture perfect photos of all of the boys sitting nicely together and smiling - definitely not the one of them wiping boogers on each other and throwing a tempter tantrum in the middle of oncoming traffic. And I won't be posting status updates about that 1/4 of a cake that I just pounded down before my kids could ask me to share with them. Instead I will be posting pictures of my stats as I'm out running. So choose your battles. No one here is perfect. The trick is to not let those imperfections get under your skin. Embrace and excel in what you can and to the rest just say, "eh, good enough" and move on.
Just finished my first half marathon! Feeling great!
(this is what you will see me post on Facebook)
In reality: I decided to train for this race so that I would have a good excuse to take a few days away from my kids:) - just add that one to my Mother of the Year application!
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